How do I know if I should quit or keep going?
I ask this question a lot to myself. When it is good to keep striving to reach your goal, and when is it okay to give up and throw in the towel and chalk it up to another learning?
I am a believer in the “pull, don’t push” method. I just made that up, but it’s the one I believe in. I believe our worlds work much better when we let our more peaceful and creative side of our minds do the heavy lifting.
One night at dinner I was talking to my fiancé. I had just had a conversation with my therapist (yes even priestesses need therapists) about this. You hear on social media all the time “never give up!” what you want is always just around the corner. Blah blah blah.
How many fucking corners do I need to turn around before this shit works out?!
I felt like I was always swimming upstream. Everything was difficult. Everything was a challenge. Nothing felt like the flow of life (eh hem, the receptive feminine mumbo jumbo I was just writing about).
It was all soooo masculine and patriarchal. Push push push, try, try, try, effort, effort, effort. Nothing in there about ease, grace, or flow.
The last words I expected out of my very male fiancé, “sometimes you need to just do the next right thing in your flow and not start from the end and work your way backward until you push a creation out, like they tell you to do”.
So everything I’ve ever learned about the law of attraction is fucking wrong?!
The law of attraction is great and all. But it won’t work anymore. The basis of the LoA is to embody a very masculine way of thinking. (remember masculine and patriarchy go together). Masculine thinking, your yang side, is direct, it pushes, it’s logical, linear and overly reasonable. The way we all grew up thinking. So what happens to all these “laws” (LoA is actually not a law in and of itself. But that’s another episode) that are law based on an outmoded, outdated way of thinking?
You guessed it, shit don’t work no more.
Have you ever internally battled “sage wisdom” you see on the internet like me? Have you ever been stuck in between “never quit” and do “do the next right thing”? Do I make an end goal in mind and break my steps down and work toward them until I reach my goal, or do I “fail fast” and “pivot”?
I’ve got a bit of a solution for you here. It’s not easy and it’ll take some time to get used to, but it works much much better. The idea here is to allow.
Ugh, those words make me want to hurl sometimes. Allow, accept, receive. BULL SHITTTTT.
It’s actually not though. These words make you want to hurl because we have been trained to believe that this is passive (therefore weak) and we can’t sit idly by as we wait for things to come to us.
Practice makes perfect. And practicing working out our feminine minds will help us with all of this. And everyone has a feminine mind. It’s the right side of your brain, you know–the one you were told to forget about when they forced you to be right-handed in school. (oh was that just me? Too bad, I’m a lefty anyway! Haha losers!)
Because see, we need to be okay with paradox before any of these words will make an impact on our lives. And paradox is inherently a feminine trait. Paradox means: to be able to hold two conflicting ideas in your mind at the same time.
So what we need to do is have a FEELING we want to achieve, not a THING, and then allow and trust life to bring us to the feeling we want. We make a move and it either brings us closer to our feeling or further away. It’s a spiritual game of hot and cold! If it’s cool, then we need to rechart our course. If it’s warm, we do more of the same.
Did you know you can’t get to the moon in one single calculation? That the path needs to be recalculated almost constantly to account for unforeseen space winds and movements in the Earth’s field. Same with our lives. If the moon is our feeling destination, then we need to chart our course daily, according to plan.
So whether to know when to quit or keep going isn’t even the question. It’s asking yourself if you are pushing or pulling. Are you forcing or flowing? Are you leading with your masculine side or walking alongside of life through your feminine side?
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