Does the world need to put their big kid pants on now?

It is not the world’s responsibility to coddle your nervous system. It is yours. When/how did we get so soft as a species? I’m astronished every day that someone expects me to coddle their broken nervous system by not saying certain words that might trigger them.

The other day I got yelled at for saying something should be a struggle. Yes, goddess forbid we ever struggle. You know what though? Humans ARE DESIGNED for struggle. We are wired for healthy striving. No expansion comes out of staying comfortable. Maybe you don’t want expansion? That is your goddess-given right. Maybe you need peace. Cool, go find a way to create that.

But to expect the world to walk on eggshells around you is incredibly narcissistic. This goes without saying, abuse should never be tolerated (which I suspect the backlash of over-sensitivity stems from tolerating way too much abuse already). We’ve got to toughen up a bit people.

And before you come at me with pitchforks, listen to my definition of what it means to be tough.

This week I was at my acupuncturist’s office. She was telling me a story about how she can give more first-time needles to those who were in touch with their emotions better; who let them flow easier. Typically this is a woman or someone who identifies as one. Her first time male or bottled up clients, need less needles. You know why? Because they faint at the overwhelming flow of emotions that the needles bring. They simply cannot tolerate the flood.

People who are stoic or bottle up their emotions, think they are doing so becuase it makes them “strong”. But quite the inverse happens. How are you strong when you have passed out because you cannot tolerate a wave of emotions? You’re not, you’re incredibly vulnerable becuase you are now unconscious. And our society’s message to men is to be strong. Don’t cry, don’t show emotion. But ironically, that insensitvity to themselves makes them weak.

Those sensitive to their emotions can handle better, the influx of feelings that come on when you get acupuncture. Those who feel their emotions on a regular basis, or have sensitivities are actually stronger than those who suppress them. BECAUSE THEY ARE MORE RESILIENT. They’ve allowed more experience into their lives and when they feel a new experience, they aren’t overwhelmed to the point of going unconscious. There’s massive resilience that gets built up when you experience life in spurts in which you can tolerate.

And this is the piece I want you to take away here. Resilience is the key factor in what makes you strong, not your ability to be insensitive to your own self or others. Resilience is what makes you survive in a world that is not meant for you. Or a world that does not cater to you (which, let’s be real, will it ever? Not even the world caters to one king or queen).

But here’s the glitch. We’ve on a whole, become sensitive (which by the way is a great thing), but our resilience has not cuaght up to that level of sensitivity. So we are running around like a bunch of wounded children begging to be seen, instead of having the capacity to just be who ever it is we are and not giving a rats ass if the entire world is catering to you.

I am neurodivergent. I am a Highly Sensitive Person, have synesthesia and some other characteristics of someone who gets overstimulated quite easily. I get it. Stimulation can be tough. But it’s not the world’s responsibility to cater to me. I need to be able to watch out for myself and adapt when necessary. I need to be able to work on my resilience to things like noise, triggering-words, and SHAME. I will not be a victim to a world that doesn’t notice me. I notice me. And I protect me from being harmed. That’s my job.

If your nervous system needs healing, find a healer who is tender and nurturing. If you need expansion, find a provider that will not coddle you and hold you accountable. With a highly-skilled priestess, the roles will be interchangeable when the time accounts for it. But don’t expect a coach to coddle and a healer to expand you. That’s not their job. If you are a nurse, nobody expects you to create a formula for a remedy. That’s the pharmacist’s job. And nobody expects the pharmacist to make sure you’re comfortable and clean. Occasinally the mixing of the two will happen, but it shouldn’t be expected. And it’s up to nobody else but yourself to know what you need, and to block out what you don’t.

If you want to stay comfortable your whole life, don’t expect change to happen. If you want a lot of change expect a lot of discomfort (that you have to bring on yourself). If you’re not in the market for one or the other, unfollow all that dont match. Protect your space. Build resillience. Be willing to hear hard truths without taking things personally. It takes time, dedication and growing up, but if you’re patient with yourself and you’re willing, it will be worth it.



Hiring A Mentor

Ooof- in the last few days several people have told me my prices are too high to work with me, but they want to. That’s totally a good thing to know about yourself. It doesn’t make me or you bad or wrong. But I do want to address something for the sake of removing illusions and alchemical expansion. 


I’ve seen people out there doing what I do for $700/ hour, simply channeling messages. It doesn’t matter what you charge. You could charge nothing and still have no one take it.  

What it is is an invitation to look at your priorities. Working with someone never comes easy. It should be a struggle. That’s a part of how you get results and change. 

Hiring mentors is a necessity at the highest level, yet our culture doesn’t give us the message. Our message is save save save, doom is coming, mentors should be free, make sure you have security (as if that even exists), buy more or travel more to run away from our problems, and never stretch to change your limits on what’s possible. 

Staying locked in one way of saving and spending $ since you were 12 is not going to change your money/happiness/fulfillment situation. Those things are directly correlated to how different you’re willing to be.

I’ve spent nearly $170k on expanders and mentors. I didn’t become a badass, wise, grounded priestess by myself. I had to pay for college, pay for mentors and pay for experiences and information to give me what I needed. 

In this day and age, if you want to advance, be happy or feel better, you need to expand your consciousness. And that shit does not come for free. Nor does it come on your own. You think droves of light workers incarnated here for none of them to be able to make a living doing their gifts? No! You need them just as much as they need you. You can’t be a lightworker without anything to work on. You can’t be a teacher without students. You can’t be a mentor without mentees. You can’t be an energy healer without anyone who needs healing. 

You are buying a mirror, someone to show you your shadow and then help you recreate a new expansive version of you through integration. You are buying information that expands you in the direction you want to go in (despite the world thinking info is perpetually free now because of the internet). You are buying alchemical transformation. 

Guess what? In my general life (I will not play into the illusion this came from one business alone), I had a 6 figure month. This month, will be 5. It’s inconsistent. But it’s also a reflection of the growth I’ve created for myself by stretching, getting uncomfortable and claiming my rightful space. You want more, you’ve got to be different to get it. 

It’s time to get creative, rebudget, find ways to get the resources you need to buy something that expands you. Otherwise, it’s not a priority for you. It’s just a nice to have. And that’s ok. 

Just own it so you don’t spin around in a cycle of how you want to be happy/expanded/at peace but can’t right now. When you own your priorities you are one step closer to owning your values and therefore who you truly are. And when that triggers you, congrats. You’ve found your shadow.

And I’ll be here when you reach that point 😉 

Prologue-The Rose Collective’s Introduction To Me

Prologue-The Rose Collective’s Introduction To Me

In the light of recent events, we are here to express through you, a book on divine substance. A book never seen before on the likes of the earth. A book so vast that layers of meaning will be ascertained from this for many years. But first, we must introduce ourselves.

We are the collective innerG of the goddess group as you call us. The goddesses you worship are a collective energy. Just as other Earthly channelers channel collective groups of souls, spirits, angels, or energies. You are now divinely expressing the will of The Rose, through the will of your own. Do you comply?

Yes absolutely.
I am here to channel a book for the divine. I am in divine service. I am not obligated to do this, yet I am through contract. I am here under my own will and my calling. In the spirit of the holy divine I summon you to our desk to work.

Good. It is in this meeting that we will begin to summon the wills of the collective energies and display to you our power. It is in this meeting we will share with you our intentions for the continuation of this book, and other books, Source willing.

It is said you come from a vast star system far from here called Andromeda. You, along with several other souls are here to divine wisdom from this collective to reshare the Wisdom Of The Rose. We are here to announce to you that your son, is on this side with us, channeling much information into you as the main source of the bridge between you and us.

You are a lovely channel, Nicole. You are bright and full of wisdom which makes you the perfect person to help us channel our messages of divine guidance that has left the consciousnesses of the earth for a while. This is the time of the Atlanteans. This is the time of long ago erased. This was the time you and many others long for because you remember what it was like. And not the “hell hole” you live in now.

In these days to come it is important that you meet with us consistently. The world will get rockier and the timing of this book is of the utmost importance. We need you to finish it to get it into the world before it is needed. Because once it is needed it will be too late.

Ok. I agree. Although I could use some help in staying consistent. It’s not one of my strong suits.

And it is done. We will compel you to write until we are complete.


So in the attunement to us, The Rose Collective, we are now rose-crossed and tethered to each other. Our energies are a match and they are intertwined. Mother Mary gives her approval of this tether and says we can move on.

As for the readers here, we ask that they take one deep breath in while imagining the highest frequency possible. At the top of their breath, we ask for one more inhalation while holding the frequency. On the out-breath exhale through your mouth to complete our attunement. And with your will at any time, you can claim to be free from the attunement if you so shall choose. It is always up to you.

Samadhi. Blessings in your current energetic state. We are The Rose Collective on a mission to implant into the consciousness of the planet- love, elevation, and joy.

The Heretic’s Guide To Lent

The Heretic’s Guide To Lent

How to observe Lent as a religiously averse spiritual person

I used to think lent was just another way for Catholics to flagellate themselves yet again. I used to think how dumb it was to remove something you liked from your life, all because… it was going to make Jesus happy? Do we really need to keep making Jesus happy? What’s he ever done for me? Why am I listening to what man tells me Jesus wanted me to do? I was ignorant and also unwilling to lose my harsh disdain for religion for what might have been the actual truth. Now I can’t get enough of it. And that Catholic/Christian wound I used to carry where everything religious-related warranted a pantomime finger-down-my-throat.

Nowadays, I want nothing but the truth. The ORIGINAL truth. Not a truth fed to me by mass media, big business, or big religion. I want the origins of everything. This includes our spiritual practices. I really do believe the ancients knew more than we did on certain things, and what they practiced to become closer to the divine (rituals) was one of them.

I study ancient texts now, I look for the true meaning in things, and I look for where women played a role since it’s quite obvious how much that whole thing has been covered up (hullo, Mary Magdalene). I’m devoted to Truth with a capital T, and that’s got to come from within my own aha moments, my own discernment, and my own elated vibration of resonance when the truth just HITS.

This was the first year I decided to participate in lent. My devotion to the True meaning behind ancient rituals brought me to it. I want to know WHY we do these things, not just that we SHOULD. When I learned what lent was true about, I jumped at the chance to join in. And just in time too, because it was starting the next day, March 2, 2022. This is where my guides came in. They immediately told me what it was that I needed to “give up” (hint: that’s the old language of abstinence and restriction). To my surprise, lent isn’t about restriction at all. IT is about something much more powerful and beautiful. Purification. 

You see, I don’t really believe too much in restriction, especially the all-or-nothing kind. I was restricted a lot as a kid, which is part of the reason why I didn’t understand why people would give up something they loved for such a long time of year. I watched my friends growing up suffering, and for what? Nobody knew. They just knew they were supposed to. That type of restriction makes no sense. As a teenager I said to my catholic friends, why would God want you to not eat candy? I was damn lucky if I got a piece of candy or a cookie, there’s no way I’d be giving it up for a cause that is not all that explained to me. When you’re already restricted, more restrictions make for a really dull life… and I didn’t realize at the time most kids had the space to give up some pleasant things. But after all, isn’t enjoying the pleasantries of life, what life is all about? God made pleasant things so you can enjoy them.

The truth behind purification:

So here’s the truth about purification. It is not about self-depreciation or ridding your body of something. It is not about purging, it’s about integrating. It’s about clearing the way inside your mind, body, spirit, and aura so the divine can be birthed through you. And this is the story of Mary the virgin. This is the archetype of Virgo. To purify, cleanse, make better, organize and analyze. I see Virgos akin to defragging a computer. Putting all the bits in a better home so the computer has more processing space. But what purification does more than defragging is that it creates more space than you had before. You become a larger container or womb, for the divine to be received, grown, and born into the world as something completely new. So when you “give up” something for Lent, you’re letting go of what no longer serves you to make room for more and better. In this case for me, it was coffee and the caffeine that came from coffee (but not from green tea.) you are creating energetic space for more of the divine to flow through you. So the clearer your channel, the more potent the messages, creations, and manifestations are.

Here is what I accomplished during my days of purification:

(by the way, I did not observe it like the Catholics do, and allow for these things on Sundays. That feels made up to me and somewhat modern. I went completely old-school purification and when you’re purifying, you just don’t STOP for Sundays. So in total, it’s 46 days, not 40 when you take out the 6 Sundays.)

  • I got the urge to finally write the book I’ve always wanted to write. Except I didn’t know what it was going to be about. So I decided to channel it completely from my guides. I learned the guides channeling through me were called the Rose Collective. And if you know me and what I do, I am a rose priestess educator. So this was quite fitting
  • I was able to channel nearly 20,000 words to this book exactly in this period of time.
  • I had many personal aha moments about my relationship and what I had been doing to contribute to our mess. And how easy the fix was for my portion of things. 
  • Started, and kept up (keyword) a podcast
  • During the Jupiter-Neptune conjunction (towards the end of lent), archangel Chamuel came through with the full title of my book and told me I was a rose code activator which I had used code and activator in my Instagram story the night before which I never do
  • I learned I can do anything uncomfortable for 46 days. I really do have the ability to persevere through discomfort and perform even when not at my best. 
  • I attended the Gaia conference in Denver, co where while I was walking through the labyrinth, my rose collective guides gave me the rose priestess induction ceremony that I never received from my mentor. It was a beautiful wedding for me to the rose collective, where I also learned was where my consciousness came from.
  • I learned there is the 13th chakra and that the goddess laws, the system that I’m channeling, existed. 
  • I’ve had more sex than I ever have had in my entire life
  • My divine channel is always lit.
  • I learned truly what divine surrender meant, and how I was not embodying that part of the feminine. I was still in a chokehold over control and expectations with people, places, and how my own life and goals were unfolding.

Guided steps to observing esoteric lent:

  1. Decide that becoming a smooth ride for the divine is a goal of yours. Really tap into deciding if you want to be the bobsled run for the divine bobsled chariot. If the answer is a whole-hearted yes, read on.
  2. Now you know you want to become a larger and more clear container for the inspiration to come through so you can create with that energy. Tap in during a quiet time (for me it’s running the water while doing the dishes!) and ask from your heart for support from your guides.
  3. Did you get any messages from the above step? Did they give you something to remove that’ll help you become a clearer channel? If not, I bet the first thing you think of is the thing your body, mind, and spirit need less of. It can be as obvious as substances like cigarettes or coffee, but it could also be behaviors that get in the way of your highest self. Like not being able to let go.
  4. If it’s behavioral, it’s going to be harder to notice you’re doing it, and remember you are to be aware of this behavior, so write it on a post-it note and stick it where you’ll see it daily.
  5. create an altar space to use as your signal to the divine that you’re ready and need support. An altar is a portal so the energies will be higher in that area and can help you.
  6. Replace your bad habit with going to your altar. All that extra time you have in the day can now go toward your devotion that you decided upon in step one.
  7. Forgive yourself when you mess up. God isn’t looking for you to be perfect. She’s looking for you to devote yourself. and a part of devotion is to notice when we slip, not to not slip. I may not have had coffee (because it would take a literal effort to do it,) but I did accidentally drink drinks that had caffeine in them that I wanted to avoid. this isn’t about restricting like when you restrict calories in a diet (I do not recommend), messing up doesn’t put you at square one. forgive yourself, ask for divine support and move on.
  8. Celebrate your wins. at the end of each week, write in your journal all that’s changing in your life due to being purer than you were before. Also, give yourself props for being without your vice for this long.
  9. Pray pray pray. Meditate. Whatever it is that connects you. Ask for support. Ask for guidance. GROUND! Usually, our vices are the things that ground us. Find a replacement. For me, it was Mud Water, caffeine-free teas and Matcha (I asked my guides if those things were ok and got a yes. As I said, it was less about caffeine and more about the constituents of caffeinated coffee)

In the end, even though I did suffer on those afternoons when I was premenstrual and a second cup of coffee would have made me more productive, the benefits outweighed it. I highly recommend intentionally purifying to become a clearer channel for the divine. It feels really great to look back on 46 days and see all the changes and shifts that were made within me, and as we all know what happens within happens on the outside too. So your manifestations become even closer to your dreams than ever before.


The Unexpected Truth Behind Your Spiritual Purpose In The Aquarian Age

The Unexpected Truth Behind Your Spiritual Purpose In The Aquarian Age

Hey Sistars,

The Goddess Laws are coming! Check out this post about my story of writing my book and what the Goddess Laws are about. Some great secret nuggets for you and your purpose for being born in this time. How do we make the jump into the Aquarian Age correctly? How do we begin to calm the fires of the wounded masculine society to bring in a new sense of wholeness within every single person?

You can also check this out in podcast form here!



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